Going Deep_A Single Dad & Nanny Romance Page 15

  I wrapped up work calls and punched things into my calendar before I signed off for the day, and by the time I was done the smells of dinner were wafting down the hallway. Steaks sizzling in a pan and sweet potatoes cooking in the oven, it smelled like the back end of an upscale restaurant downtown.

  And yet, it was simply Madeline cooking in my kitchen.

  We ate in relative silence while Clara rolled around in this mesh crib-like thing on wheels I had found after Madeline had been kicked out by Gracie, and every once in a while I caught her stealing a glance before she turned her attention back to her food. I was getting concerned that maybe I’d made her feel uncomfortable, with everything she came back to and the clothes I’d bought. But, before I could talk to her about it, she was clearing the table just as Clara began to yawn.

  “Looks like someone’s getting tired,” she cooed.

  “You go put her to bed. I’ll clean the kitchen.”

  “Are you sure?” she asked.

  “Yep,” I popped.

  I listened to her lightly serenade Clara before everything went silent, and just as I was placing the last dish into the dishwasher, I heard Madeline pad across the hallway and make a beeline for her room. I groaned and leaned against the kitchen counter and I began chastising myself again. I always had to be so bold in every fucking thing I did, and sometimes I forgot that Madeline didn’t like bold. She didn’t like cocky and arrogant. That wasn’t her thing.

  So, I poured myself a stiff drink before pouring her a large glass of deep, crimson wine, and I started off towards her bedroom door.

  “Madeline?” I murmured. I knocked my knee against the door lightly, and when she opened it her eyes fell to the glasses in my hands.

  “Care for a drink?”

  She smiled lightly and took the wine glass from me, and when our fingers brushed together a spark ignited. She yelped lightly at the shock, and all I could do was smile before she brought the trembling wine glass to her lips. I watched a flush trickle down her neck as her body shifted from foot to foot, and I was beginning to get the impression that the tension between us wasn’t malicious.

  “I believe I promised you a story,” I said quietly.

  25

  I listened to Derek’s story with wide eyes the entire time. I knew something had been off about her, but as he told me everything that transpired, the only thing I could do was reach out for his hand and trace light circles on it.

  “She was married? The... entire time she knew you,” I breathed.

  “Yeah…” he trailed off.

  “My god, Derek. I ... I’m so –”

  “I know,” he interrupted me. His eyes fell to our hands before I felt his grip tighten, and the only thing I could do was steady my heart rate with some deep breaths. Ever since that morning when he threw open that door, I hadn’t been able to think about anything else but him. He looked so sexy, with the scruff on his face and that white t-shirt clinging to his bulging chest. The veins in his forearms pulsated with every movement he made, and all I wanted to do was lay my body onto his and forget everything that had happened. I wanted to forget Gracie, forget being thrown out, and forget leaving him and Clara. I wanted to lose myself in his eyes and wrap my fingertips in his hair. I wanted to crash my lips against his and –

  “Madeline?” Derek asked.

  “Huh?”

  “You all right?” he chuckled lowly.

  “Yeah, yeah, yeah. You were saying?” I asked.

  “I wasn’t saying anything,” he smirked.

  Shit. Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit.

  “I’m really glad you’re back, Madeline,” he said softly.

  “I’m really glad to be back, Derek,” I smiled.

  “But if this is going to work, I mean… really work… I need to tell you something.”

  “You mean there’s more after the ‘married girlfriend that faked being sick to embezzle money from you to float her and her husband after you got her pregnant’ bit?” I smirked.

  “God, I love your wit,” he breathed.

  And the sentiment stopped me in my tracks.

  “Y– ... you what?”

  His eyes slowly panned up to mine, and when I finally took a chance to meet his gaze the ferocity behind his eyes took my breath away.

  “I love you, Madeline.”

  I couldn’t move. I couldn’t speak, I couldn’t shift, and I couldn’t even yell for joy. The words I’d only heard him mutter in my dreams had just poured from his lips, and my entire body was rebelling against what I truly wanted to do.

  What I desperately wanted to do.

  “You came into my life when it was in a tailspin. I’d had this… this child dropped on my doorstep and I was at a loss. Gracie’s note hurled me into a place of vulnerability I didn’t even think was possible, and I was just so anxious to pawn the responsibility off on someone else and then get on with my life.

  But you came in and you… you didn’t take my shit,” he chuckled. “You stepped into a role I had no idea how to perform, and you demanded better of me. You demanded better of a man who was convinced he’d reached his best: his peak; the pinnacle of his life. You looked at me, Madeline, and you said ‘you can do better.’”

  It was then he grabbed my hand, and I sucked in the air my body desperately needed before he downed the rest of his drink and tossed his empty glass onto the coffee table.

  “When Gracie kicked you out, I couldn’t turn around. I knew that I’d see the hurt in your eyes and I’d step up and stop her from doing it. But I knew something was wrong, Maddy, and I knew I couldn’t have you here if I was going to figure it out.”

  “Maddy…” I breathed.

  “Madeline, sorry.”

  “No, no, no… I like it,” I smiled.

  And it caused him to smile, too.

  “When I finally figured out what was happening, and what Gracie was doing, the only thing I could think about was Clara: how Gracie was the one holding her and feeding her, and how that person should be you. It made me wonder what truly makes a father and what truly makes a mother; and it showed me that you’ve been more of a mother to Clara than Gracie ever could have been.”

  I felt tears springing to my eyes before I brought my wine glass to my lips, and I chugged the rest of the tart liquid before I swallowed deep and grimaced.

  “Feel better?” he smirked.

  “Much,” I choked out.

  “You rolled your way into this penthouse and you turned it into a home, Maddy. So – I knew when the Nanny Agency called me back and said you’d agreed to come back that I wanted you coming back to a place you could call home, too. A place that, if you wanted, could be permanent…”

  I felt my heart still at his words. I wrapped my hands around his while they shook in shock, and I scooted my body closer to his. So close, in fact, that my leg was pressing up against his.

  And god, did he feel warm.

  “I love you, Maddy, and I want you to stay – forever – in whatever capacity that means. If you’re only the nanny, then you’re only the nanny.”

  “But…?” I questioned.

  I saw the hesitation brewing behind his eyes while the words danced around in his head. Oh, the limb this man had crawled out on to spew such beautiful words to me. A powerful man of stature with the financial expertise of those thrice his age, and he trembled on the couch with me while he lay bare what part of his soul was left after this entire debacle.

  “Just say it,” I urged him.

  “You’re mine, Madeline,” he said as his voice darkened, “and I’ll do anything and everything I can to protect you, provide for you, and love you – for as long as you’ll let me.”

  My chest was panting with his words and the blood in my veins was boiling. Every deep, dark thought that had crossed my mind came flooding to the forefront and every lustful, greedy need I’d ever imagined lurched my body forward, and before I knew it my body was in his lap and my lips were pressed against his. His hands clasped my back
and pulled me down on top of his body, and we both slid down onto the couch before I snaked my hands underneath his shirt. For the first time since I’d known him, I finally knew what it was like to feel the rippling muscles underneath his taut skin, and the desire that ebbed and flowed throughout my body came spewing out in one fluid sentence.

  “Take me.”

  I felt him still underneath me and it caused me to open my eyes. His pupils were blown wide with hormonal lust and his grip was tight on my hips, and when I nuzzled my nose against his, I felt his breath pulse against my skin with every word that came after.

  “Don’t open something you aren’t ready for yet.”

  It wasn’t a request, or a demand. It wasn’t a warning, or even a wanton sentiment. It was a plea: a plea from a man who had endured too much loss in his life to prepare himself for another one. In one sentence, he had communicated that he couldn’t do it again. He couldn't love and lose again, otherwise it might kill him.

  Kill him and leave Clara fatherless.

  I was never going to let that happen.

  After all, I loved Derek too much.

  “I’ve missed you my entire life, Derek,” I whispered against his lips. “You can have me any way you wish.”

  In one fluid motion, I was sitting up and in his lap. My knees were planted into the couch and his hand was pressing into my lower back, and I could feel his length growing underneath me before his hand made its way into my hair and wove my soft tendrils around his dexterous fingers.

  “Is that a promise?” he growled.

  “No,” I said before I connected my gaze with his.

  “It’s a challenge,” I smirked.

  Suddenly I was in the air, and my legs were firmly locked around his waist. His hand released my hair and his palms grasped my ass, giving him the leverage he needed to hoist his weight back and carry us to his room. My lips locked onto his neck and sucked deep marks on top of his throbbing veins, and the groans that dripped from his lips were nothing short of pornographic.

  He dropped me to his bed and hovered over my body, and when his eyes connected with my panting chest, I decided to give him a little show. I slowly rose to my knees and scooted myself to the edge of the bed, and I could see the impressive bulge trying to tent the fabric of his jeans. My fingertips grasped the hem of my shirt, raising it above my body, and I knew the moment he laid eyes on what was underneath it would spiral him out of control.

  And that’s exactly what I was hoping for.

  I didn’t want kind, and I didn’t want soft. I wanted every primal inch of him. I wanted to drive him wild and watch his muscles expand and contract due to the combustive energy his body would produce to bring mine pleasure.

  I wanted to be marked as his, and I wanted the remnants of this moment to follow me into the morning.

  I tossed my shirt to the floor and sank down onto the bed, my knees parted and my ass jutting out, and all I could do was reach my hand out and grab his t-shirt before pulling his face down to my level.

  “How did you know red was my color?” I hummed into his ear.

  I felt the fabric of the sexy lace number I’d pulled out of the drawer from earlier flutter against my skin, and I could feel Derek physically holding himself back. He nuzzled his nose against the skin of my neck, and a sigh peeled from my lips before I leaned my head over and exposed my skin to him. I was crawling with energy I wanted to release on him, and it killed me that he was being so reserved.

  “What’s the matter?” I whispered before I caught his earlobe with my teeth.

  But all he did was pant heavily against me.

  My eyes flickered along the side of his face and I saw how set his jaw was. I saw his hands balled up into fists at his sides, and it was a stark contrast to the man who had just poured out his soul to me on the couch. I leaned my lips in and kissed the shell of his ear, and when he sighed and leaned into my lips I whispered my wish like a prayer to God.

  “Please, Derek.”

  “Oh, god, Maddy,” was all he said. His hands rushed to the button of my pants and he undid them with a simple swipe of his hand. He pushed me down onto the bed and I could feel my breasts freely moving underneath the thin lacy fabric. He fisted my pants and ripped them from my legs, revealing to him the matching panties I had found them buried in that same drawer. My gut was screaming, and every atom of my being was crawling with electricity for him. I could feel my nipples puckering hard against the fabric while I watched Derek slowly remove his shirt. His granite abs and his thick chest finally came into view, and all I could think about was how I was going to sink my teeth into every inch of his skin all through the night.

  I was going to ruin him, just as he had already ruined me.

  I got up from the bed and catapulted my body into his. He reached his arms out for me and held me against him, and as I buried my tongue into his mouth my hands wrangled with his jeans. I got them undone and slid the fabric down his long, strong legs, and when he stepped out of his pants he whirled me around and barreled us out of his room. I peppered his shoulders in kisses and ground my hips into his stomach, and just before, I went to leap back for his lips, my back landed against something firm –

  – Cool, firm, and smooth.

  Derek pressed his body weight against me, trapping me between his heat and the coolness of the windows in his living room, and I watched his every move as he slowly inched the lacy fabric above my head. My core was slicking itself with my juices while he slowly undressed me like he was opening his favorite Christmas gift, and when the fabric lightly fluttered to the floor, he dipped his head down and took my pert nipple into his mouth.

  “Oh, fuck,” I breathed.

  I leaned my head against the window and felt his throbbing erection teasing me through my soaked underwear. God, how I wanted him to fill me up: to show me off to the people below so they all would know exactly who Derek Blake belonged to.

  So they know who I belonged to.

  My hands rushed through his hair while his teeth rolled my nub around in his mouth, and his hands grasped tightly onto my thighs as I slowly began to grind down onto him. His body was strong and his muscles indented the thickness of my body. It was as if I was designed to mold into every position he decided to put me in, and whimpers began to pour forth from my lips when he robbed me of his touch to look me in my eyes.

  “You’re beautiful, Maddy,” he said softly.

  I fluttered my eyes open and leaned my head back to look at him, but just as my eyes connected with his, I felt his hand meander between us and move the thin, wet fabric between my legs off to the side.

  “And you’re mine,” he growled.

  He lined himself up with my entrance and bucked his hips against me, and the sensation that ricocheted through my body was nothing short of catastrophic. I felt my walls fluttering hard around his thick dick, and his hips snapped against mine as his body pressed mine into the window. Skin against skin echoed off the corners of his penthouse as breathless murmurs poured from my lips, and soon I pitched my body forward and wrapped my arms around his neck.

  “Yes, Derek. Please. Oh –... oh god.”

  His balls were smacking against my ass and my juices were dripping down his length. Just as I was approaching my undoing, he ripped himself from me and put me down onto my feet.

  “Turn around and put your hands on the window,” he ordered.

  I couldn’t move fast enough to have my hands planted on the window, and that’s when I felt him rip the lacy underwear I was wearing right off my body. The tattered fabric went fluttering to the ground, and I watched it waft in the air conditioning of his penthouse before he lined himself up with me again.

  “God, yes,” I whispered lightly.

  He pressed himself inside of me and my legs visibly shook. He grasped my hips and pulled them higher, and then he pressed my body against the window. My cheek was plastered onto the cool glass and my painfully erect nipples were throbbing with the cold, and when I felt his lips
on my shoulder, I couldn’t help the words that tumbled from my lips.

  “I love you, Derek.”

  He began to thrust again, this time much slower, before he sucked a patch of skin in between his teeth. He licked and he gnawed, his hips slowly filling me with his length. He traveled the span of my back, marking me like he would his property before he reared back and picked up his pace. Harder and harder he thrusted, and with every thrust he made I could feel his balls smacking against my swollen clit. My essence was trickling down the inside of my thighs and my legs were growing weak as my body climbed its precipice of pleasure. Just before I was ready to dive off into the deep abyss of Derek’s body, he stopped and pulled himself out.

  “Nooo,” I whined lightly.

  Derek grasped my shoulders and spun me around before his lips lightly connected with mine. My legs gave way and his strong arms caught me. There was nothing but the moonlight caressing our skin. My body hummed a tune his body responded to in harmony, and all I wanted was to bring him pleasure…

  …To make him moan my name with the happiness only I could make him feel.

  “Patience,” he whispered.

  I felt him pick me up before he carried me to the bathroom, and he set my naked body on the edge of the tub before he got in it himself. I raked my eyes along his strong body, watching as every muscle he moved twitched underneath his luscious skin. He started the water to fill the bath and dumped some bath salts into it; then he turned his body back to me and smiled.

  “What do you want?” he asked.

  His question caught me off-guard.

  “What?” I breathed.

  “What do you want?” he asked again. He slowly walked towards me, his eyes never wavering, and the only thing I could do was stare. I watched him kneel on the stairs of the tub, his hands reaching to part my knees, and I could feel the rush of cool air as my glistening core was laid bare for him. His eyes flickered down to the center of my body and a smirk crossed his face. He licked his lips, like a lion ready for dinner, and my body slowly began to lay itself down before I heard the question again.